We've all felt some sick pleasure in tearing someone else down, and it's usually behind their back or over social media. If you think about it, it's honestly sad. I admit that I have done it. In no way am I pointing fingers because I know I have three pointing right back at me. That's the thing about tearing others down, what we say about others is a reflection of who we are.
I thought "drama" would stop after high school. As if throwing my cap in the air, moving out, and beginning college were signs of maturity and that I was a woman. Except, that's not how it was. The drama was still there, just at a "new age" level. Instead of notes being passed around with cruel words and drawn up pictures, it was now through forms of Facebook posts and tweets. I would have almost preferred the college-ruled paper with the awful words.
I made it out of college alive, but I'm twenty-five and I'm still surrounded by the judgments, assumptions, and meanness. I've still made those judgments, assumptions, and acted in mean ways. It's gotten to the point where I wonder if we will ever grow out of it. Then I see The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and think, "There is no hope. We will be fifty and we will still be catty." What a terrifying thought.
So, I am changing my way of thinking, and I hope you join me. We don't have to end up like the housewives. We don't have to continue to judge each other. We don't have to assume the worst simply because we refuse to see the good in each other. We don't have to talk behind each other's backs. We don't have to blast each other on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. We don't have to make each other feel worthless, ugly, fat, or dumb.
Instead, we need to empower each other. We need to encourage each other. We need to love each other. We need to accept the differences. We need to use positive words. I'm not saying we have to all be best friends, skipping around, spewing rainbows out of our asses. I'm just saying we don't have to be filled with so much hate.
The next time you begin to judge, think about why. Why do I feel this way? Why do I want to make this person feel bad? Why does the way they live their life affect me? If we took the time to answer these questions, then maybe we would think twice about badmouthing or plastering it all over the web. Instead, we would probably see something in ourselves that we need to love a little more.
Maybe we won't start a revolution, but we can start something good within ourselves. Maybe we can't change others or their actions, but we can focus on being better people. Maybe our love won't be accepted by some, but we can continue to send it out into the world. Maybe we can't make girls become women, but we can become women. We can be the change we wish to see in others.
Make the change. End the cycle.